Between the Lines
by IsisIzabel
Summary: Nate/Jenny fic, based on the TV show: Alternate ending to episode 3.16 The Empire Strikes Jack . What if Nate hadn't found Jenny? Rated M for date rape and language.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

He had never been to this bar before, and there was probably a reason for that. The stench of cigarette smoke burned his nose even before he went inside. Nicotine stains had yellowed the wallpaper inside and it was more crowded than he had imagined. The blue lights on the walls were out in some places, and the noise inside was almost deafening.

_Where the hell is she?_

Nate's eyes scanned the bar quickly, barely taking notice of the redhead who had unbuttoned her shirt and was flashing a blue lace bra to a group of men in the back corner. Loud, raucous laughter caught his ears and he turned his head, seeing a group of men a few years older than him throwing back shots near the bar. His gut clenched, knotted painfully.

She was somewhere in here.

"I'm just saying," a guy to his left was saying to a friend, "that girl look liked she was twelve. We probably should've called her a cab."

Nate didn't hear the beginning of his buddy's reply as he turned to them, cutting neatly into their conversation. "The girl," he bit out, his blue eyes flashing, "where is she?"

The two friends exchanged nervous glances. The one he had overheard pointed to a curtain behind them. Without another word, Nate shoved between them and stalked across the floor. He yanked back the curtains, not sure what he was quite expecting.

Jenny had sounded wrecked on the phone, and watching her stagger out of Eleanor's with Agnes—since when was she hanging out with Agnes again?—hadn't made him feel any better. Something was off with the whole situation.

Nate stepped into the room and his heart sank to his knees. Save for one bartender to the side, the room was deserted. He glanced down at his phone. The map displayed showed that she was here.

He frowned and hit redial, waiting as the phone began to ring. He heard the muffled ringtone from the couch and moved forward, finding her phone beneath several cushions.

Swallowing hard, Nate looked around the room once more, desperately searching for any signs of Jenny as his stomach twisted harder and the truth crashed down around him.

Jenny was gone.

She felt strange. Wrong.

Like the time she was six and spent the night at Claire Orton's apartment—her first sleepover. She remembered waking up, but knowing something was off before her eyes opened. This wasn't her bed, this wasn't how her room felt, and that wasn't the sounds of her parents making breakfast in the next room.

That was how she felt now.

This wasn't her bed. She knew that much before her eyes opened. And this wasn't her room. The smell was musty and thick and stale. It smelled like a locker room.

Jenny pried her eyes open, wincing against the light from the window across the room. Her head pounded painfully, throbbing and pulsating. She was going to be sick.

She was flat on her back, staring up at the white ceiling. It tilted and spun, she could feel her world shifting on its axis.

She slowly pushed herself up onto her elbows, the well used sheets dragging across her body. Blinking, she started to take in her surroundings.

There was a stack of books across the room in a haphazard pile, clothes hung out of ever drawer of a four tiered dresser that had clearly seen better days. She looked down and realized, thankfully, she was the only person in the queen-sized bed and that her dress was still in place.

Swallowing back a sob, she shifted her legs and dangled them, bare, over the side of the bed. Her feet hit the wood floor and moved across something rough. She glanced down, her stomach rolling as she saw her stockings on the floor.

_Please, God, no…_

Her underwear were crumpled a foot away from her feet.

Jenny hung her head, letting her chin drop to her chest. Taking in a shuddering breath, she slipped out of the bed, wincing at the sharp pull between her legs, confirming her fears.

She felt her hands beginning to tremble and knew it was only a matter of time before she was shaking beyond control. She needed to get her things and get out as fast as possible.

Jenny bent over and grabbed her stockings and underwear, balling them in one fist. Her purse and heels had been cast aside near the window. She struggled to get the shoes on and then stumbled blindly towards the door, the throbbing in her temples threatening to bring her to her knees. She made it out of the bedroom, never bothering to look back. She shoved the undergarments into her purse and stopped to listen, grateful when she was met with silence.

She made it into a sparsely decorated living room. The kitchen was off to the right and she could see a pile of dirty dishes in the sink, but no one else seemed to be around. Jenny spotted a phone mounted to the wall by the kitchen, but quickly dismissed the idea of calling anyone.

She didn't know who to call, and even if she did call someone, she had no idea where she was. And then there was the possibility that whoever lived here might come home…

She shuddered and kept moving for the front door, her heels clicking hollowly across the floorboards. The door had five locks on it, but only the first one was bolted. She easily undid it and opened the door, throwing it open and rushing into the hallway.

Jenny let out a breath she hadn't realized she had been holding and slammed the door shut behind her. She whirled, all but running for the door that marked the stairwell down the hall. She pushed past an older Hispanic woman who gave her an angry expression and shoved open the door of the stairwell.

She ran down the stairs, nearly tripping several times. Three steps from the bottom, her ankle rolled and she fell, falling in a heap at the bottom. Her palms burned and her knees stung, but she forced herself upright, clutching her purse.

Jenny came out the ground level of the building and wound her way through the hallways until she saw the main exit. She pushed past a woman and her toddler and hit the street at a run.

The sunlight was blinding and startling to her. Jenny stopped to catch her breath and felt her legs beginning to shake. Several people were looking at her now.

It was at that moment she spotted a bus stop at the corner and a bus rounding the corner two blocks up. She made it to the stop as the bus pulled to the curb and she jumped on, digging in her purse for her wallet.

She found it and was gratefully surprised to see it still had money in it. She shoved some bills at the bus driver and hurried to the back, collapsing on a bench by herself. She set her purse on the seat beside her and pulled her knees up to her chest, hugging them.

Jenny rested her chin on her knees and stared out the window as the bus started down the street and wished the whole thing was a bad dream, but somehow she knew that was just wishful thinking. It wasn't reality.

In reality, she had just lost her virginity to a guy she didn't know, and never would. Humiliation burned in her chest and she allowed herself one tear to slide out.

She figured her innocence was worth one tear.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

All Jenny wanted was a hot shower and her bed. Sitting alone on the bus, she had mentally started to make a plan—something to divert her attention from what had happened. She decided first she would take a shower, and then she would crawl into her bed and sleep. She craved both deep in her bones as she stepped off the elevator. Upon rounding the corner and seeing six sets of eyes fixed on her, she knew it wasn't going to happen.

Sucking in a sharp breath and ignoring the pounding in her head, she looked at her father. She felt her hands start to shake. "Dad, I—"

"Do you have any idea how worried we've all been?" he cut in quietly. From beside him on the loveseat, Lily reached for his hand, giving Jenny a gently disapproving look.

Jenny let her eyes drift shut for a brief moment, choosing to ignore Dan, Serena, Eric, and Nate all crammed together on the opposite couch. She took a tentative step forward. "Dad …" She trailed off at a loss.

"Where have you been?" Rufus demanded quietly.

Now she looked at the foursome on the couch. Dan's gaze was accusing, spearing her with anger and annoyance. Serena looked empathetic—she herself had been here before more times than anyone could count. Eric and Nate both looked exhausted and concerned.

Jenny swallowed and looked back at her dad and knew there was no way she could get into what had happened to her with all of them sitting there like judge and jury.

"I mean," Rufus went on after a heavy pause, "where did you go _after_ the club?" With that he tossed something into the coffee table.

Jenny's heart sank. Her cell phone. No wonder she hadn't been able to find it.

"Nate found that when he went to pick you up, but you had already left."

Her gaze swung to Nate as she tried to remember the fragmented bits from the night before. Nothing was making sense.

Nate's shoulders sagged and he gave a sad shake of his head. "I saw you getting into the cab with Agnes."

_Agnes_.

The name slammed into her, sending her reeling. Agnes had been there. She had gone backstage to get her things and Agnes had handed her a drink…

After that, things got fuzzy and muted. A blur of colors and sounds, but nothing sharp and definite.

"You saw me with Agnes?" Jenny pressed, her brow knit in deep concentration.

He nodded slowly. "I called your phone, but when I got to the bar you were already gone."

"Wait—" Growing more confused by the second, she held up a hand to stop him. "What bar?"

Dan sighed loudly, rolling his eyes to the ceiling and shaking his head. "Seriously, Jen? Were you that wasted you can't even remember where you were?"

"Dan," Serena started softly, her tone warning him to back off. She laid a hand against his arm and shook her head.

Rufus stood up, shoving his hands deep into his pockets. "You know, Jenny, I thought you going back to Eleanor's would be a good thing. I thought maybe it would help get you back on track. If I knew you would start hanging out with Agnes and going out drinking …" He sighed. "I just expected more of you."

Jenny could feel the sharp sting of tears pricking the backs of her eyes. She opened her mouth to explain, but no sound came out. How could she explain anything to them when she didn't even understand herself?

"After everything that happened with Damien and the lying … I truly thought you had learned your lesson, Jenny. Clearly I was wrong."

She took a deep, shaky breath. "Dad, please. I didn't—"

"Didn't what?" Rufus asked, never raising his voice. "Did you drink last night?"

She frowned, thinking of the champagne flute. "Yes, but—"

"Did you go to a bar with Agnes?"

She swallowed a sob. "It's not what you think."

"Where were you last night?" he asked finally.

She rubbed her temples, thinking of the apartment she had woken up in. The rumpled sheets, the smell of sweat lingering in the room.

"I can't…" She couldn't finish the sentence. The words simply weren't there.

Rufus shook his head. "Go to your room, Jenny," he ordered quietly. He turned away from her and moved to the window.

Wordlessly, soundlessly, and without glancing at anyone else, she turned and walked slowly up the stairs. Her legs were stiff and she was sore inside and out. She made it to the landing and lengthened her stride until she was safe inside her own room. She flipped the lock and leaned back against the door as her legs gave out.

Pressing a hand to her chest, she felt her breath catch and then she was crying, sobbing, as the dam broke. She curled her legs up to her chest and rested her forehead against them, giving up.

"I can't believe her," Dan muttered, going for his coat. He jerked it on, seething. Rufus and Lily had retreated to their room moments after Jenny, leaving the four teenagers on the couch to speculate where Jenny had been and what she had been doing.

"Oh, come on, Dan," Serena cajoled, shrugging from her place on the couch. "So she went out and got drunk. This isn't the end of the world."

Eric frowned. "But Jenny doesn't drink."

"Apparently she does now," Dan countered, scoffing.

Serena sighed and rolled her gaze over to Nate, who was oddly silent. "Come on. We've all done worse things than going out and getting wasted. Jenny's not a little kid anymore."

Dan squinted at her, his gaze incredulous. "Tell me you aren't serious."

Serena chuckled. "Dan, I think you need to calm down."

Shaking his head, he started for the door. "Maybe you had no problem going out, getting drunk and doing God knows what when you were sixteen, but that isn't what I want for my little sister." He turned and walked away.

Serena's mouth dropped open. "Unbelievable."

Eric was still frowning. "This just doesn't seem like Jenny." He stood up and headed for the kitchen.

Serena shrugged and stood up, looking down at Nate. He was still staring blankly at the opposite wall, thinking.

"Nate? _Nate_?" she pressed, finally shaking his shoulder.

He blinked and looked up at her.

She smiled down at him. "Ready to go?"

Nate stood slowly, his eyes moving around the room before landing on her. "I'm just going to use the bathroom and we can go."

She nodded and reached for her mother's copy of _Vogue_ that was lying on the end table. She sank back onto the couch and started flipping through it as he went to the stairs.

Nate took them two at a time, pausing when he reached the second floor. He followed the hallway down to the bathroom, passing Jenny's door as he went. He hesitated, lingering at her door. He tilted his head, listening.

He could hear her crying on the other side and something in his gut twisted. Seeing her downstairs, so defeated and exhausted bothered him more than he wanted to let on. She looked genuinely at a loss, completely bereft.

Something just wasn't right with this whole thing.

He had seen Jenny go head-to-head with her father before. Had watched her openly defy anyone who would challenge her. Even when she was wrong, there had been a strength and a determination to her that made him want to smile and shake her all at once on more than one occasion.

She had none of the fire downstairs. She seemed confused and lost.

Before he could over think it, he knocked on her door. He waited, hearing her shift inside the room and the lock flip open.

"Dad, I really just want—" she began as she opened the door, stopping when she Nate standing there. Her eyes widened and two more tears fell in tandem down her crimson cheeks. She sniffed and reached up with shaking hands to wipe the tears away.

Nate sucked in a sharp breath, stunned. She looked nothing like the confident, self-assured social queen she had been projected the last few months. Her eyes were swollen and red from crying, her cheeks were splotchy, and her hair was a wreck.

His eyes rounded as worry flooded him. "Jenny—"

"Nate?" Serena called up from the bottom of the steps. "Are you almost done?"

His gaze went from the stairway back to Jenny's face. He started to shake his head, not caring that Serena was waiting for him. He raised a hand to push her door open more.

Jenny leaned her head against the door for a brief second and then looked up at him. "Go, Nate. Just go." She shut the door on his face and turned the lock back into place.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Night was always the hardest. It was the time when she couldn't seem to distract herself from her thoughts. Fragmented images were all that remained of the night one week ago when she had lost the last thread of innocence she possessed. They tormented her like a demonic kaleidoscope, twisting and changing as the night dragged on.

That didn't mean days were much better.

With school over for the summer, Jenny had been confined to the penthouse suite. But that suited her just fine. She had no desire to walk out on the busy streets of New York, routinely brushing against random strangers.

What if one of them was _him_? What if he cornered her and asked her a question and she froze?

No, isolation was best, she had determined. Not that she had much of a choice. Rufus had firmly put his foot down—Jenny was grounded for the foreseeable future. No amount of cajoling from Lily or even heartfelt talks from Serena would sway him. How Lily and Serena handled Serena's acting out was their business, but Jenny's indiscretions were his and he wasn't letting her out of his sight.

Eric had tried to comfort her for the first few days, bringing in bags of DVD rentals, trying to urge her into a _Sex and the City_ marathon, but after the first season he had given up. He tried cornering her into talking, but Jenny had become a master at evasion.

Her room had become her prison and her sanctuary.

Now, staring at the calendar on her desk, Jenny was starting to panic. The walls were closing in on her. Her chest constricted painfully and spots swam in her vision.

Her period was a day late.

_Stress_, she tried to assure herself. _It has to be stress._ Hands shaking, she pushed back from her desk and looked around her room. The rumpled bed sheets hadn't been changed in a week, and her room was starting to take on a strange smell that she had always associated with being sick. The air was stale and thick all at once, the remnants of the second shower she had taken that morning hanging like a heavy cloud.

Her heart slammed against her ribs as someone knocked on the door. Swallowing, she went to the door and opened it.

Serena smiled kindly at her. "Hey, Jenny. Rufus wants you downstairs for breakfast."

Jenny's jaw clenched reflexively. One of Rufus's new rules was family mandated breakfast's at least once a week. Lily, Rufus, Eric, and Jenny would be joined by Serena and Dan to round out the perfect blended family for one meal a week. By default, Vanessa and Nate had been included.

Panic started to claw at her throat again at the thought of being in a room with that many people.

"I'll be down in a second," she said, her voice rusty from lack of use.

Serena sighed and leaned against the doorframe, her eyes sad. "Jenny, it _will_ get better. I promise. Your dad will ease up eventually. He really loves you, you know?"

"I know," she answered, lowering her eyes to the floor. She did know how much he loved her. She never doubted that.

"Just come downstairs and try to have some fun, OK? Maybe I can convince Rufus to let you come to a movie with me for the afternoon?" She winked conspiratorially. "I can be your chaperone."

"No, thanks," Jenny murmured. "I'll be down in a minute."

Shrugging, Serena nodded and turned away. Jenny reached for the oversized NYU jersey Dan had bought and she had promptly stolen. Her thin body was swallowed up in the thick folds of fabric that hung to the middle of her jean-clad thighs. She scraped her hair back into a messy bun and started downstairs.

"Don't stare," Eric warned lightly, keeping his voice low as he watched Nate's eyes go wide.

Nate swallowed hard and looked at the shorter boy. "How long has she been like this?" His eyes went back to the staircase Jenny was slowly descending.

The sweatshirt engulfed her, hanging well past her fingers. She looked pale and gaunt, and her eyes were downcast. She moved gradually across the room until she was at the table and able to sink into her seat. She sat stiffly, her head still bowed.

Nate looked up and traded worried glances with Dan. Apparently he hadn't seen Jenny's new look either. Even Vanessa seemed a bit stunned.

"Let's eat," Rufus announced, bringing in a plate piled high with waffles.

Nate moved forward, sitting automatically beside Serena which put him directly across from Jenny, who had Eric and Dan on either side.

Vanessa jumped right in, smiling down the table at the girl who had always been like a little sister to her. "Is that Dan's NYU shirt, Jenny?"

Jenny nodded mutely. Her body moved on autopilot, taking a croissant as the basket was passed. She set it on her plate and tore off a small piece from the end. Nate watched as she stared at the bread in her fingers, silently waging a debate over whether or not to eat it.

Vanessa pursed her lips and gave Dan a helpless look.

Dan nodded quickly and nudged Jenny's arm. "Any other shirts of mine you've stolen lately? I might have to start raiding _your_ closet."

Eric leaned forward. "That burgundy Chanel dress she has would be a great color for you." He smiled innocently at Dan.

Vanessa, Serena and Lily started laughing and Dan reached behind his sister to swing at his stepbrother. Even Nate and Rufus cracked a smile, but Jenny didn't seem to hear any of them.

Clearing his throat, Nate leaned forward. "Hey, Jenny, can you pass the orange juice?"

She looked up, clearly startled, before reaching for the crystal pitcher and extending it to him. He extended his arm, his fingers brushing hers and the sudden panic in her eyes made his stomach twist. She gasped and pulled back, dropping the pitcher before he could react. It rolled on its side, spilling the juice across the white tablecloth.

Serena jumped up, shoving her chair back to avoid getting soaked as Lily and Vanessa immediately started reaching for their napkins to slow the liquid's spread.

Nate could only stare at Jenny as she started trembling, biting down hard on her lower lip.

Rufus, Eric, and Dan joined in the cleanup efforts, but the juice had spilled halfway into the serving platter of waffles and those had to be wasted.

"It's just an accident," Lily kept repeated calmly. She squeezed Jenny's shoulder on her way past with a handful of soiled linen napkins.

"No use crying over spilled orange juice, right?" Vanessa added weakly, following Lily with her own napkins.

"Yeah," Nate said after a second, shrugging. "I didn't really want some anyway."

Jenny's eyes slid closed. "May I be excused?"

Rufus sighed and leaned back in his chair, shaking his head. "Fine."

The word was barely out of his mouth before she was out of her chair, moving faster than Nate had ever seen her go. She flew up the stairs and he heard the muted click of her door being shut moments later.

Serena touched his shoulder. "I'm going to see if my mom needs help." She smiled thinly and headed for the kitchen,

"Dad, what the hell was that?" Dan demanded, his eyes narrowed.

"Jenny seems to be taking her grounding to heart. Maybe this will be the change she needs," Rufus said softly, rubbing his temples.

"This isn't depression over being grounded," Dan replied, clearly frustrated. "That girl isn't Jenny. She's like—"

"—a shell," Eric finished quietly. He looked imploringly at his stepfather. "She's getting worse."

After a second, Rufus's shoulders sagged and his head dropped. "I know. But I'm not sure what to do."

Nate leaned back in his chair and glanced once more at the staircase, wishing like hell he had an answer for that question.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

She was going crazy.

Jenny hesitated at the top of the stairs, straining to hear an invisible noise from downstairs. Her fingers curled tighter around the railing, her knuckles going white. After several heavy seconds she exhaled hard, her shoulders sagging.

She was so jumpy these days.

Jenny was turning to leave when she heard the noise again, this time louder and more definitive. It was coming from the kitchen.

Whirling, her long blonde hair flying about her face, she gasped and then swallowed hard. Her stomach knotted and twisted. Her mouth went dry.

"Dad?" she tried, her voice barely coming out louder than a whisper. Taking a deep, steadying breath, she cleared her throat and tried again.

"Dad?"

Another noise and then footsteps were coming towards the stairs. Jenny poised herself to turn and run, knowing her father would have answered back had it been him. Someone was in the house. Someone who was _not_ her father, and he was the only one who could have been home by now. Lily had a meeting with the board and Eric was at a movie with Serena.

Her heart hammered against her ribcage painfully and she started to get dizzy when a familiar dark head appeared.

"Hey, Jenny," Nate greeted with an easy grin that showcased his dimples. "I didn't think anyone was home."

Relief surged through her body, crushing her under its weight. Unable to stop herself, her legs gave out as though made of rubber, and she sank onto the top step, gasping.

_It's just Nate,_ she assured herself, trying to quell the panic attack that was threatening to overtake her any second. Swallowing a sob, Jenny pressed the heels of her hands to her eyes. She could hear Nate moving up the stairs towards her.

"Whoa, hey," he said as he stopped two feet below her. "Did I scare you?"

She nodded mutely, not trusting herself to use her voice.

"I'm so sorry," he apologized, his tone sincere. "I let Serena borrow a book and she left it here… I didn't think anyone would be home."

Jenny finally moved her hands to her lap, praying he didn't notice the way they were shaking.

But he was Nate, so of course he did.

He reached out slowly, eyes wide as he took one of her hands in his. "Jesus," he whispered. His eyes moved to her face. "Jenny, I didn't mean to scare you—"

She gasped out a nervous laugh. "It's … It's fine. I'm a little jumpy, I guess." She tugged her hand out of his and dropped it into her lap.

"What are you even doing home? I thought you were heading to the Hamptons with Lily and Rufus," he said slowly, leaning against the wall.

_Because every time someone touches me on the streets I feel like screaming,_ she answered in her head.

"Touch of the flu," she said weakly, knowing it was a believable lie. Lily had certainly fallen for it earlier. No makeup, dark circles under her eyes, limp hair and baggy sweats were all the convincing Lily needed.

"Are you contagious?" Nate teased, his eyes smiling.

"Maybe," she said softly, glancing away as she thought of all the tests the women's clinic in Brooklyn had run earlier in the week when she finally dredged up enough courage to walk through the doors and see a doctor. Thankfully, mercifully, the pregnancy test had come back negative. The doctor assured her she could be late due to stress, and Jenny realized that was the case when she got her period earlier that week.

Nate nudged her knee with his and sat down on the step beside her. He leaned briefly against her shoulder and smiled. "That's OK. I like Jenny-germs."

She glanced at him, wishing like hell she could match his smile but she just couldn't find the power to do it.

He never faltered. "I feel like we haven't talked in ages. How have you been?"

"I'm OK," she said carefully. She chewed absently on a thumbnail, not noticing she had already torn the nail down to the quick.

"Jenny," he started, blowing out a hard breath, "we're friends, right?"

She nodded slowly, an icy ball of dread curling deep in her stomach. She instinctively leaned away from him, resting her head on the opposite wall.

"I get the feeling that something's wrong," he said softly. "If there's anything I can do to help—"

"There isn't," she said sharply, her voice brittle. "I'm OK."

"No offense, but you're not," he said bluntly, his words softened by his kind tone. "This isn't the Jenny I know. The Jenny we all love."

She laughed, the sound foreign, fake and hollow to her own ears. "Oh, no? And tell me, Nate, what was so great about that girl?"

His eyes widened noticeably. "Jenny, I didn't mean—"

"Maybe I just finally grew up," Jenny snapped, anger swelling up in her suddenly. Her fingers curled into fists as her eyes narrowed. "Maybe I realized that none of this matters."

Nate swallowed. "Jen—"

"Not Constance, or being a designer, or having the best fucking Prada bag in the building," she hissed, getting to her feet. She stared down at him, her eyes hard. "None of it matters. Not one goddamn thing, Nate."

He got to his feet just as fast, reaching out to touch her shoulder. He froze when she flinched away from his touch. "I'm not going to hurt you," he said softly.

Shivering inside, Jenny crossed her arms across her chest and took a few steps back. All the fight and the fire that had churned up suddenly dissipated just as fast, leaving her feeling raw and exposed.

"Just leave me alone," she said finally, shaking her head. "Just go, Nate."

He frowned, confused. "I'm not leaving you like this. Something is wrong, Jenny. Let me help you out."

"You still don't get it, do you?" she said after a long pause. "You _can't_ help me. You can't fix this." She edged back further, craving the sanctuary of her own bed. She wanted to sleep, and silently cursed herself for even getting out of bed today. She turned to start for her room.

"What happened the night of Eleanor's party?"

Jenny froze, his eyes sliding shut. "What?" she managed to choke out after a second. She looked back over her shoulder at him, letting her long hair fall across her face so he couldn't really see her.

Nate took a single step towards her. "This all started the night of Eleanor's party. The night I saw you get in that cab with Agnes and those other girls. You called me, but by the time I got to the club you were gone."

Jenny's stomach cramped suddenly, like she had been sucker-punched. So much of that night was just fragmented memories, but now she could remember she had called Nate. She remembered the scratchy cushion of the couch she had collapsed on. She could remember him saying he was coming.

How close had she been to being saved? A minute? Ten? An hour?

"Jenny, what happened after you left the club?" Nate pressed softly, standing right in front of her now.

She blinked, startled. She hadn't noticed him coming towards her. Looking into his blue eyes, she could feel her resolve crumbling as tears stung the backs of her eyes.

"I don't remember," Jenny said finally, her voice barely above a whisper.

"You don't remember?" He frowned, cocking his head to one side. "How much did you drink."

"One drink," she replied. "Just one. Agnes gave it to me at Eleanor's."

"How can you not remember if you only had one…" He trailed off and his eyes went wide. "Did she … Did Agnes put something in your drink?"

She couldn't make herself say the word, and she couldn't force her head to nod. She was frozen, trapped in the moment. She could only stare into his eyes, silently pleading with him to put the pieces together so she didn't have to. It was a jigsaw puzzle without all the pieces. There were still so many holes, how could she ever begin to explain them all?

"What happened?" His voice went hoarse, expecting the worst. "You can tell me, Jenny."

She opened her mouth, but the words stuck to her throat. "Nate, I—"

A cabinet door downstairs slammed shut with a loud bang, the sound echoing off all the walls and vibrating up the hallway.

"Nate? Are you still here?" Serena called from the bottom of the steps.

His eyes swung from the landing to Jenny, knowing they only had seconds before Serena came looking.

Jenny squared her shoulders and lifted her chin a notch. "Go on, Nate."

"But—"

Jenny was already halfway in her room. Her fingers curled around the wood frame of the doorway as her paused, not looking back at him. "I told you before: there's nothing you can fix."

Her door shut and Nate flinched back.

"Nate!" Serena called more insistently now.

"I'm coming," he answered back, his eyes still on Jenny's closed door.


End file.
